Full Moon Party, Mushrooms & Adults Crying at a Kids Table!
Welcome to Koh Phangon
After a long hitch at work I had saved some money to go travelling once again. I had a seven hour drive from work to the Edmonton airport, then a 13 hour flight to Tokyo, 5 hour flight to Bangkok, 45 minute flight to Koh Samui and an hour boat ride. 27 hours later, enter Koh Phangon. Iarrived at about 10am. the island seemed desolate as I stepped on, Except of course for a crowd of taxi scooters and Thai people cleaning up the beaches from the mayhem the night before. all the party goers were obviously still sleeping in a hung over comatose state.
I had arrived a day early to the night of the full moon party such that I could gather my barrings and see what this island was all about. I went and grabbed some breakfast and a beer, strolled along the beaches, helped some Thai people pick up garbage, which they were very appreciative of actually. then I went and checked into my hotel and had a well deserved nap.
I woke up around 5pm. perfect timing I thought. grab a shower and time to hit the streets. when in Thailand showering at anytime besides bed time is useless. It always seems to be 35 deg celcius even at night and 40-45 during the day. Being from Canada, I sweat profusely at all times of day and night no matter where I am. I’ve made the mistake of jelling my hair and going out a few times now. the gel only last for about 15 minutes before I look like a sweaty whore who just made $50. So i head out and grab a beer at the 7/11 and start walking around and chatting people up. i walk randomly into a shop that has singlets for sale. I need a bright-colored one for the next night and some paint. I’m browsing around and all of a sudden I lock eyes with another dude across the singlet rack from me. “hey buddy, shopping for some Full Moon Singlets I see?” “Haha ya he says”. then holds up a bright pink one in front of him and asks, “does this one make me look gay?” “nah you pull it off bro!” “great, my name is Tyco!” he replies as he sticks his hand of the rack for a handshake! Success, I’ve made a new friend from the USA. We exchange details and make a plan to meet a bit later. Now I had met a pretty cool guy in the Tokyo airport that i had exchanged contact details with earlier on the way here. We had figured out that we would both be at the full moon party together…. “Ding” my phone goes off and I look and it him! For the sake of this story his name is Matt. The exchange in the Tokyo Airport was a very interesting one involving a third member. I was doing my usual airport routine of sitting at the bar having a drink and Matt was the random person beside me this time so we start talking. Figure out we are both from Alberta, Canada and have a lot in common. we both travel a lot and share interests. Now enter third random guy sitting beside me. He pipes into our conversation after he over hears that we are going to Thailand. “I’m going to Thailand too!” he proclaims. Matt and I turn our attention to him. “Ya i got every year for a couple of months. My boyfriend lives there in Pattaya” he says. Matt and I both reply, “Awesome dude”. “Ya” he says with a big smile. This guy is really skinny, with a haggard face and very large wood framed glasses. If you were to think of what your stereotypical pedophile would look like, this is him to a T! “Ya I’ve got a boyfriend…..well he’s a lady boy” he says, “oooooooh man do I love Thailand and the lady boys!” Matt and I are having a great chuckle at this guy. hes very open and talking loudly from being a couple of beers in at this crowded Japanese bar in the Tokyo airport! haha anyway that was my first experience with a guy that straight up admitted that he loved them.
anyways back to the story! So i meet up with Matt at a local beach bar. He’s with about 5 new-found friends that he had just made. Excellent work Matt! commence crushing beers in liver preparation for the full moon party the next night. now Matts new friends had other friends wanting to meet them on the beach, just a ways down for drinks. we all head out and meet up with even more new-found friends. This is the reason I rank Thailand as my number one favorite country on earth. It’s the perfect ratio of Gorgeous, cheap, friendly tourists, friendly locals and the party’s are great. Also when making friends, they just snowball. So we crush beers for hours and get to know each other. We eventually meet up with Tyco along the way too. At this point we have a group representing all around the globe. We had, Australia, Britain, New Zealand, USA, South Africa, Spain, even a Thai native and of course Canada.
Its getting dark when Tyco hits me with it! “we should find some Ecstasy!” he says quietly to me! I give him a strange look as if to say why would you pick me out of this crowd as being the recreational drug user! but he was right! he must have had a good eye for these things. “no bro, I’m not risking that in this country. besides anything we find will be fake anyhow!” “oh common man, i wanna get some for the full moon party tomorrow night and I need a solid wing man as back up for dealing with these people” he says. Now at this point I had a good buzz on and was feeling fairly confident, so i tell him, “alright ill go with you, let’s do this!” we wander around and start asking the locals and then finally wind up asking some taxi drivers. they say yup they can get some for us. We are like okay let’s do this. “follow me” the one guy says. And we walk down the road for a while then, yup as you would have figured takes us into a dark alley. me and Tyco look at each other and give a slight nod as if to say, shits getting real, game face. we walk down the alley but then it opens up into a larger gathering area and there are many taxi drivers there just hanging out. Tyco gives him the money, the guy walks over to his fellow taxi driver and then comes back after a short minute. he hands Tyco a package and off back to the beach we go. we stop of course for a short inspection of the package. Tyco opens it up and discovers 4 gelatin pills with a dark brown powder inside. “looks like legit MDMA to me”, Tyco says. “looks like it yup”, I respond. “crack one open and lets lick a bit of it to see if it tastes like it”. Tyco cracks one open and we taste it. Now me being from Canada I know what celery salt is. not many people have heard of this. but it is a famous rimmer for a Canadian drink we have called a Ceaser. I say it right away, “that tastes exactly like celery salt!” Tyco being from the states has no clue what celery salt is or what it tastes like. anyway he is convinced its real and he gives me one for being his wing man on the deal. I pocket it and save it for the next night unsure if I will take it or not.
we meet back up with our international party group and they decided they wanted to go to the clifftop bar. I had not heard of this bar before, but one of the people in our group had heard that’s where they sell the mushroom shakes! my eyes light up! “mushroom shakes? let’s go!” Where I am from in Canada Magic mushrooms grow from the ground naturally and we use to get dressed up and eat them every Halloween and head to the bars! it was our Halloween tradition! so I had a fair amount of experience with them. we head up to the bar and I look around and see many people drinking mushroom shakes. I approach a few people and ask, “how potent are they?” everyone tells me to drink at least 2 if I have previous experience with them. so I go to the bar and order two and slam them back. 45 minutes later I get a buzz. just a slight buzz. I knew they were there for sure! the shakes are legit. a little weak for the price but legit. i guess it’s better that way, they don’t want random 18 years olds drowning or jumping off the cliff thinking they can fly from being high on mushrooms for the first time. we ended the night just chillin out at the clifftop bar, since it was a chill zone really anyhow. lots of foreigners drinking mushroom shakes and smoking joints. we eventually all went home and made plans to meet up the next night for the long-awaited full moon party.
Full Moon Party Day
I’ll skip right to the gory details. 5pm commence, the DJs are setting up on the beach. they are starting to play loud music. Our international group of friends all meet for supper. We eat, drink, and discuss where are we all going to get ready for the party. I offer up my room wanting to be friendly, not a hundred percent knowing what i just offered. Since most were staying at tiny hostels and i had a hotel room, It was settled. everyone to Nicks room to paint our faces and pre drink.
It was finally dark and the music was pumping and you could hear the heard on the beach! We head out into the mayhem. 10,000 party people partying on the beach. oh sweet jesus! we drink and dance for hours. Tyco approaches me, “i’m going to take mine”, he proclaims and I see him throw a pill into his mouth, take a chug of his beer and swallow. “okay fuck it” I said. I reach into my pocket and I was literally sweating so much from dancing that the pill had melted in my pocket! haha, I was slightly aggravated about that but no worries I said, I wasn’t really in the mood for that tonight anyhow. I had my heart set on another little fungal fun friend! We eventually lost the group and it came down to just Tyco and I. And yes indeed, he did get super high from that pill. he was obviously in his own little world of fun in his mind, so I coaxed him to the bar on the cliff. “I’ve got a mission bud, let’s go” as I grab his hand and pull him along with me like a toddler, weaving in and out of the thousands of people on the beach. we reach the bar and I storm up to the counter, lay my money on the table, “5 shakes” I proclaim loudly and proudly. the Thai guy mixes up 5 shakes and sets them on the counter as he takes my money. I down the first one and second one immediately, but from wanting to get the job done and also it was so hot and they actually tasted really good! an icy smooth and cool milkshake texture with a strange twang of Mushroom involved. as I grab the third one and start downing it, the Thai guy from the bar comes running back to me, “No no no” he is yelling over the music, “those are not all for you?” he questions my ability. “yes they are as I set the third empty glass down and grab the other two before he could take them away from me like a spoiled child! I’m walking away giggling and he smiles and says “have fun buddy”, I’m like “oh i will”. i down the next two shakes, grab Tyco and take off back out of the bar down the long flight of rock stairs to the beach. I tell Tyco, I’ve got 45 minutes until shit gets weird. Tyco reaches into his pocket takes another pill and says, “yup me too!” now Tyco is an extremely friendly sociable guy normally. But not tonight, he is mostly swaying his head back and forth barely keeping his eyes open while staring up at the stars mostly on this particular evening! But that fine, I’ve been there! Any recreational drug user has been there!
Zang! the mushroom shakes have hit me like a punch in the face. Tyco is gone. Lost in a sea of ten thousand people ironically beside the sea! Or so I come to realize in my strange mind. Oh well time to make some new friends. I scower around scoping for a target. I see a big group of probably 15 people standing in a circle up the beach. I approach and wiggle into the circle. It was shoulder to shoulder in the first place so my wiggling in did not go undetected! Everyone stopped talking and looked at me. “Hi I’m Nick, I’m with you guys now” I say. Everyone giggles and chippers right up, “Hi Nick!” the group was very welcoming for such an absurd approach. I ask them where they are from, they tell me Estonia. I’m like, ‘right on”. they begin asking me where I’m from and asking me other questions. I am conjuring up answers but quickly realize after about 2 minutes into this conversation that i have the attention span of a gold-fish at this point and I’m not able to carry on such a sophisticated at a grade 10 level conversation. these people were definitely not drunk enough for me. I giggle politely mid sentence and back away from the group proclaiming “yas are very nice people, nice to meet yas but I gotta go, bye” and I run off into the darkness. definitely not representing Canada well. well to some that’s a perfect representation. but anyway I had grown tired of the beach scene and it was now time to move inland to the town streets to see what they had to offer. I stop in at the 7/11 to grab a beer. I couldn’t quite make up my mind as I stare into the cooler at all the different assortments of beers and wine coolers and vodka drinks, the colors and the shapes dancing around like a little beautifully orchestrated ballet. had they been practicing this before I had got here i wondered. these sneaky little fuckers seen me come in and started dancing just for me. I open the door and realize how amazing the cooler cold felt. I wiggle as far into the cooler as I could and tryed to shut the door on myself, but it was no use it was not deep enough. an Australian girl approaches, looks at me funny and asks what are you doing? im like it is so hot out there. I noticed she was perspiring out of control as well. she says “yes I know it is!” I open the door quickly and grab her arm and yank her in saying, “quick get in”! she laughs but simply thinks im strange, rightfully so and pulls away. grabs her drinks and leaves quickly. well I thought, id better do the same. i grab a big beer and head out. at this point the party is dying down on the beach and the streets become flooded with hundreds of people heading toward their rented homes. the streets are literally packed with people walking all one direction. I follow the heard when all of a sudden i find myself walking toward a fully grown adult male in his late twentys sitting on the curb sobbing. and i mean full blown crying heavily with his face barried in his palms. i’m like oh fuck! not a single other person seemed to notice him. so I sit down right beside him, I put my arm around him, he looks up at me, I look him straight in the eye and say, “whats wrong friend? what happened?” He replys while tears stream down his face, “my girlfriend left me and I don’t know where she is, we came together, and we got into a fight and she took off with other people……” he’s going on and i’m trying to listen but at the same moment, across the street a spot a kids table and four kids chairs. I look at him again and say, “hold that thought buddy, ill be right back” I take off running across the road, grab the table and place it in the middle of the street. people are wondering what i’m doing because the table starts dividing the flow of one way traffic. I run and grab the chairs and set them up accordingly. I run over and grab my new-found sobbing friend, grab him by the arm and drag him over to the table, “sit with me” I command to him. he accepts. I put my beer on the table and tell him, “okay go on”. he continues to tell me his story and now i’m just trying my hardest to focus on his fuzzy face. my eyes are making everything around me fuzzy and the store fronts are changing colors. focus! i’m asking him little follow-up questions that don’t really matter to me, but just to keep convo going, “whats he name? who were these people? where do you think she went? how long have yas been together?” there’s hundreds of people walking by staring at us wondering what we are doing sitting at a kids table in the middle of the road one man sobbing another blinking heavily and hard-drinking a beer looking all around. just then another drunk friendly guy sits down, “what are yas doing? can I sit here?” im respond, “absolutely, this guys GF left him and he’s really upset about it!” the new drunk friendly guy jumps up, “oh no! ill be right back”. i see he runs over to the shop and comes immediately back out with 6 beers and places 3 of them in the middle of the kids table. and disperses the other three to the crying guy, himself and I! we crack them open, “thank you man, cheers!” now crying guy recaps the story to new friendly drunk guy. there only one chair left at this kids table or sorrow! it’s not long before we have a fourth! “who’s amazing idea was this?” a fourth friendly guy sits down! the four of us chatted for about an hour and cheered the crying guy up. at least he had friends now. the streets became barren about 5am in the morning rolled around and i went home. a very successful full moon party had been had!
When on Koh Phangon, make sure to hit up the Slip and Fly party! it is an amazing afternoon activity for inspiring a good day drunk!
- Nature/Landscape – 10/10
- Food – 8/10 (very very good)
- Price – $
- Alcohol Price – $
- Locals – Super friendly and all spoke English
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